Some months ago I discovered a great, feminine Youtuber, Caitlin Huber aka Mrs. Midwest.
She’s funny, pretty, articulate, seemingly inclusive, and encourages women to unabashedly embrace all things “feminine.” Even better, she’s Christian and though “traditional”, not overly judgmental and/or outright insane and preaching looney doctrine *coughs in Lori Alexander.*
At the heart of Mrs. Midwest’s message was this notion that femininity and traditionally feminine traits aren’t weak, rather society needs to elevate femininity and stereotypically feminine ideals, not that women need to become more stereotypically masculine, which is a great message. I’ve always taken umbrage with notion of feminine traits being weak, and housework/raising kids not being considered real work since 1.) we literally pay others to clean for us and watch our kids 2.) Jesus exhibited traits like gentleness, kindness, patience, nurturing, etc. and He was anything but weak. I think the concept of femininity, particularly Biblical femininity, is stupid and not actually Biblical, but as someone who prefers wearing dresses and still makes my father set up car appointments for me, it’s nice to find culturally feminine women who aren’t insane or fishing for sugar daddies.
Then, I discovered some more insidious things about her, mainly that she supports Red Pill nonsense, follows some questionable dog whistle for white supremacy folks, and thinks a guy who believes rape should be legal on his porch is inspirational.
Now, if Mrs. Midwest wants to larp 50s housewife style, great. I’m also not entirely convinced she’s a Nazi racist. Racially insensitive? Yes. Some looney, potentially harmful views? Absolutely. But I’m friends with many far-right people (benefits of living in the South) that if one were to glance at their social media and the people they follow, would be deemed “literal Nazis” even though they’re not. Besides, an actual racist wouldn’t even bother playing at diversity, like Mrs. Midwest does, they would be full blown girlinclownico.
My problem with Mrs. Midwest is how she lumps Red Pill trash in with Christianity, as if those things are in any way compatible, and markets it in a cottage core package to young, impressionable women and girls who want to be stay-at-home wives and mothers. Fundiesnark are generally a bunch of bullies, but they do have a good summary of her Red Pill beliefs on reddit.
**FundieSnark spends more time bullying her for being a poor food photographer, using beige filters, having a husband who doesn’t like being on camera, and possessing an unusual taste in home décor than they do talking about her actual views (which aren’t fundamental). Ironic, how a group who claims to dislike fundies for forcing their lifestyle on others, constantly makes fun of Mrs. Midwest for not cooking, dressing, and decorating her home the way they prefer…
Anyway, disturbingly Mrs. Midwest by her own admission admits her endgame is simply to make Red Pill rubbish more palatable to young women so they aren’t reasonably turned away from it. Not to spread the message of Christ or encourage women to embrace their femininity, but to cushion Red Pill nonsense in a pretty package so that women can get roped into relationships with controlling, abusive, men who liken them to dumb children.
Skip to the end, about 50: 18 where she says that’s the entire point of her channel. To be clear, you cannot be a Christian and preach/subscribe to Red Pill ideology and think men like Yugiohabs, Stefan Polywhatever, and Rush V are okay. As Christians, we need to call a spade a spade every time we see one; we can’t condone or dismiss certain sins (like racism, abuse, and exploitation) yet claim to have the moral highroad on issues like abortion and marriage when ironically the Bible says a lot more about the former three than the latter.
Edit: the video is predictably gone. However, Godisgrey has clips of it in a video she did on Mrs. Midwest starting at like the 6:00 min mark.
Furthermore, husbands are called to love their wives as Christ loves the church (Ephesians) being will to die for them, and we are to love our neighbors and pray for our enemies (Mark 12:31, Matthew 5:4). Do we really think Jesus would say rape on private property should be legal or that the Holocaust was legitimate? Are we really saying men who call women whores and sluts are behaving like Christ?
The Bible is clear that we as Christians are to serve one another in love (Galatians 5:3). To love our enemies and do good without expecting anything in return (Luke 6:35). And yes, this applies to our romantic relationships as well. Denying ourselves, as Mrs. Midwest talks about in this interview, doesn’t mean not eating a doughnut, it means choosing to show patience and gentleness to your children when they’re acting up and loving your wife when she’s being quarrelsome. It means not cussing out the person who cut you off in traffic and not gossiping about that one coworker (or Youtuber) you don’t agree with (or ya know, just not calling them whores).
The Bible is antithetical to the essence of the Red Pill, which promotes an extreme view of cultural gender roles based on pseudoscience and not Biblical truths, claims women are hypergamous, advocates for domestic abuse, and essentially says women are dumb children that need to be led. It is Biblical submission without the husbands loving their wives as Christ loved the church part of which submission is contingent upon, which creates an unhealthy, potentially abusive dynamic where women must unquestionably obey a man, even when that man is not himself in submission to Christ and is sinning. And how did Christ love the church? He died for them, washed their feet, and spent his life serving them just as Christian husbands should do for their wives.
Submission wouldn’t be the issue it is if just as much emphasis was put on husbands loving wives as Christ loves the church, as there is on wives submitting to their husbands unquestionably. I can find a zillion sermons on submission, very few on husbands sacrificially serving their wives and families (or even sermons on literally the hundreds of other things God specifically tells men to do in the Bible, like gouge their own eyes out for looking at porn).
Mrs. Midwest and those like her are dangerous because of how nicely they package the Red Pill message in cottage core, cute dresses, baking, and slow-living, cushioning it with just enough Biblical truth that it sounds legit and looks appealing to those wanting traditional lifestyles.
However, it’s all for the goal of making this lifestyle look desirable (we should be doing all for the glory of God anyway, not the glory of an ideology). Being at the mercy of a man financially, physically, and emotionally isn’t even Biblical (Proverbs 31 woman worked/was independent, as were many women in the Bible; emotional stability comes through Christ, not your husband, and Jesus actually placed education above housework (read Luke 10, where Jesus scolds Martha for being worried about temporary things, while Mary chose the better, eternal thing by learning His teachings)). The sort of men drawn to this rhetoric aren’t interested in Christ-like relationships that display God’s love for his bride (the church); they merely want a woman who’ll put up with terrible behavior unquestionably simply because they’re men.
But we know that If anyone says, “I love God, yet hates his brother, he is a liar. For anyone who does not love his brother, whom he has seen, cannot love God, whom he has not seen. And he has given us this command: Whoever loves God must also love his brother.” (1 John 4: 21) and that, “We know that we have passed from death unto life, because we love the brethren. He that loveth not his brother abideth in death.” (John 3:14).
You cannot claim to love God and treat women (or anyone) poorly, or as the Word puts it, you’re living in death not life through Christ. So no, you can’t claim to be wholesome while doing an interview with a man who makes a career out of gossip and slander (Proverbs 11:23, 16: 28 “a perverse person stirs up conflict, and a gossip separates close friends” – some translation use slander instead of gossip), thinks rape is okay, yet fail to address that hypocrisy when called out on it. It weakens both the message of Mrs. Midwest and more importantly the Gospel.
Christian women and girls need to be sober-minded and alert, and most of all aware of what the Bible actually says about masculinity and femininity (spoiler alert: very little) and how a man should behave, so that when men and women like Mrs. Midwest weave in foolish ideologies that are antithetical to the Bible and use that to treat you poorly, you’ll know exactly where it’s coming from.
And “[e]very good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows” (1 Chronicles 16:11-12). So if it’s not good, it ain’t from God and you don’t have to put up with it.