Biblical Clownery: Beach Preacher Logan Dorn

Logan Downbad Dorn approached a bunch of young ladies wearing bikinis on the beach (imagine that) and harassed them over said bikinis.

Biblical Clownery is when individuals try to justify clown-ish behavior using the Bible. This includes quoting verses out of context to make a point, cherry-picking scripture, or twisting the meaning of something in order defend and/or justify their actions/reactions.

Case in point:

Biblical Clownery typically comes at the expense of scripture that contradicts what they’re trying to prove, scripture in general, or scripture that gives important context in terms of understanding what’s being said. It’s often accompanied with a dose of hypocrisy and a claim to be “speaking hard truths” when actually they’re just being jerks.

Jesus said there will be many who preach in His name (Matthew 7:21-23), but aren’t Christians. Fortunately, the Bible says they’ll know us by our fruits.

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control. Against such there is no law. (Galatians 5:22-23, NKJV)

When in doubt, look at the fruit and when a tree isn’t bearing good fruit, the Bible says cut it down, or as the kids nowadays say, ‘we don’t claim him’.

To nitpick Logan’s actions and why they’re clown-ish, after realizing these ladies weren’t going to just quietly sit there and be shamed, Logan rambles about free will whilst ignoring the lady who reminds him Jesus told men to not look at women as “pornogropahy”, but if they do it’s better to gouge their eyes out (the female body isn’t pornographic anyway so Logan’s mind is sick. It doesn’t help these girls look 12. So, this adult man went over to what could’ve been literal children and called them pornographic and is now claiming God sent him over there. That’s sus, dude).

His excuse for harassing these young women?

The sight of them filled him with righteous anger.

Let’s just camp there for a moment.

Think about all the problems in the world – hunger, violence and abuse, exploitation of the poor, human trafficking, greed. Now imagine out of all those things, young women in bikinis on the beach is what fills you with righteous anger and is the reason morality is declining in the world.

Anyway.

Next, he claims to be speaking “truth” but nowhere does the Bible tell women to cover up if men look at them lustfully, so what “truth”? He eventually attempts to preach likely after realizing he’s a creep and poorly quotes Jesus words, “[i]t would be better for them to be thrown into the sea with a millstone tied around their neck than to cause one of these little ones to stumble.” Even though initially he says it’s about other men, now it’s “think of the children!!”

Some woman (likely sensing things were going south) appears and says value thyself while in a bikini.

For context, you can see what these ladies were wearing here…

@ggarbagefairy

@Logan Dorn sir this is not the way to “spread the word”. Spread love instead. Get well soon. #harrassement #feminism #beaches

♬ original sound – Mia

Pretty standard bathing suits (also it appears they were an all female group; wonder if he would’ve approached them had they been with males – the answer is no.)

Anyway, Logan defended himself (poorly). (He also deleted his original Tik Tok video)

He plays off his bad behavior as righteous anger even making up some fanfiction about children of very specific ages being bothered, which if you listen to ggarbagefairy’s video, his initial reason was that other men might be bothered

First, the female body isn’t sexual. God created Adam and Eve nude so if there was something inherently sinful about nudity He would’ve clothed them on sight. The American church’s current view of the female body is the result of sin and cultural conditioning. The issue isn’t women wearing thongs, it’s that culture has sexualized every part of the female body where consequently men can hardly look at an attractive, young women simply lying on the beach and not think sexual thoughts – ironically, this seems to be particularly bad in the church. However, Christians are to walk by the Spirit, and not the flesh (Galatians 5…). Therefore, Christian men like Logan should die to themselves and view women in purity regardless of what they’re wearing. That he claims God sent him over there indicates he was following his flesh, not God. If God had really sent him over there, it wouldn’t have been because of their clothing.

Second, holding non-Christians to Christian standards is stupid. As he had no evidence these women were Christians, to hold them to his personal standards is ridiculous particularly without first preaching the Gospel to them. It’s the love of God that leads us to repentance (Romans 2:3-4), not judgement and condemnation. Therefore, if his intentions were to share the Gospel, he would’ve first approached them with love. All his current TikTok #iloveyou #Godlovesu is an attempt at revisionist history to make it seem like his intentions were to evangelize them all along and he simply got tripped up over his words in the moment.

Anyway, those who wanted to stone the woman caught in adultery were not without sin and thus had no room to condemn her. Likewise, Logan can miss me with this holier than thou attitude, or in the words of Jesus, take the speck out of your own eye first, ya pervy hypocrite.

Third, the Bible puts the onus of lust on the luster.

You have heard that it was said, ‘Do not commit adultery.’ But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman to lust after her has already committed adultery with her in his heart. If your right eye causes you to sin, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to depart into hell.

So the sinner here is Logan who committed adultery. His righteous anger was misguided and ought to have been directed at himself.

Besides the fact this Clown was on the beach and should expect to see people in various states of undress, the lady from his fanfic had the correct response to feeling uncomfortable: move.

If he really felt outraged, he could’ve left. (also, notice how in ggarbagefairy’s video he says he’s not bothered, but later claims to be filled with righteous anger – so which is it? Cause lying is a sin too, brother). Anyway, I can respect those who sacrifice personal comforts to live a Godly life. Consequently, he could’ve preached a decent message on how he struggles with porn/lust and seeing women in bikinis triggers him, so he peaced out Joseph-and-Potiphar’s-wife style and encourages others to do likewise. Sadly, that’s not what he did.

Last, at worst, he should’ve sent his girlfriend over there. The lady at the end (in a bikini) was able to deliver a similar message (in a bikini) more kindly even if she was in a bikini and needed to mind her own business. I just can’t with this pathetic version of masculinity Christian men have been displaying lately. To harass a group of young women over what they’re wearing is pitiful.

True Biblical masculinity is serving others in love, displaying the fruits of the Spirit which includes self-control, kindness, and gentleness, not being prone to anger or outbursts, not engaging in worldly matters, not gossiping or slandering, turning the other cheek when someone wrongs you, and laying down your life for others.

Furthermore, the highest goal as Christians is to spread the good news of Jesus Christ. It’s clear Logan Van Dorn didn’t approach these ladies with any intention but to shame them for turning him on – his poor attempt at evangelizing came merely as an afterthought and his very words reveal his own lust. Again, “…the love of Christ compels us [to share the gospel] because we are convinced that one died for all, and therefore all died.” (2 Corinthians 5:14, NIV)

It’s important to not get sucked into Biblical Clownery like purity culture. There’s a place for modesty and it’s fine to consider how we can help others, but modesty isn’t limited to what one wears and the intention is to honor God, not coddle weak-willed men who can’t keep their eyes and hands to themselves, and placate their jealous fiancées.

To his semi-credit, Logan did sort of apologize in a “sorry I offended you” way and only after it was clear practically no one was on his side (which apologizing only because you’re being called out isn’t a genuine apology). Logan can #jesuslovesyou youth pastor-lite #Godisfaithful #iwasbroken sermon all day (also lol @ nay a single scripture being quoted in his entire “I’m sorry” video. But sure, go off in Jesus’ name). Ultimately, his own words revealed his heart and it was not one that desired to see those young ladies come to know Christ.

If he’s really a Christian, he’ll humble himself and truly repent, acknowledging his own lust and publicly apologizing properly, both to God and to these young ladies, for acting like a fool in the name of Jesus.

To end, Logan should probably take his own advice…

And actually try looking like Jesus.

4 thoughts on “Biblical Clownery: Beach Preacher Logan Dorn

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