The Transformed Wife Is Still Wrong: On Anna Duggar

The Transformed Wife seems to be hiding something.

Case in point:

Thus her subtle defense of Josh Duggar comes at no shock – sounds like Ken has more than a few skeletons in his own closet given how hard she’s simping for pedos. Fortunately, Luke 12:2-3 says, “Nothing is covered up that will not be revealed, or hidden that will not be known. Therefore whatever you have said in the dark shall be heard in the light, and what you have whispered in private rooms shall be proclaimed on the housetops.”

Fundies and their holier-than-thou cause “we don’t smoke, curse, and watch tv attitude” whilst supporting abusive men is baffling.

Christians like Lori seem to have intentionally forgotten what Biblical marriage is and consequently spend too much time justifying bad behavior from husbands to maintain a veneer of holiness by staying married at all costs. Marriage should reflect our relationship with Jesus; He is the Groom, we are His bride. Yet, at some point some Christians began interpreting headship not as like Jesus whom husbands are called to emulate; the same Jesus who led by displaying the fruits of the spirit (gentleness, kindness, etc.) and serving his bride while on Earth, but as “blindly and unquestioningly obeying the whims of a husband who may or may not be acting like Christ,” which is not Biblical.

I’m convinced the Apostle Paul was thinking specifically of Lori Alexander when he told women to shut-up – I’ll add that Lori shouldn’t teach women, children, animals, plants, fictional characters, and aliens too. Lori is ever learning, yet never coming to the knowledge of the truth because her entire identity is wrapped in being a wife/mother, rather than in Christ. Thus everything she “teaches” comes not from a place of “what can I learn about God/how can I become more like Him?” and teach others to do so, but “how can I keep being a wife and ensure others stay wives too?” It’s a sad state of existence.

Any who, Lori blogged about Anna Duggar in response to a Facebook post. I plucked out some highlights to discredit. Her words are in parenthesis, which I’m too lazy to underline.

Divorce rates among Christians are almost as high as they are among “heathens” lol. Clearly, something ain’t working.

Purity culture is not “God’s way.”

Again, Lori’s own husband, Ken Alexander, said incest/molestation are normal so idk why she’s acting up. These are his words, credit freejinger as he obviously deleted the OG post.

“Such molestation is rampant around the world, especially with families in close quarters where the the children come from multiple fathers. Where I grew up my friends would ask me if I molested my sisters, because for them it was common place with the older sister often molesting the younger brother, etc.”

Ken Alexander, Lori Alexander’s husband.

Jim Bob admits about 19:00 they talked to a lot of other families who had worst stories than theirs in regards to Josh molesting his sisters, the details of which they severely downplayed.

This is a grievous sin that breaks God’s heart. Yet women like Lori consistently downplay what would have gotten these men stoned to death in OT times. Funny how those who want to live like the Israelites in Deuteronomy did, cherry-pick what to follow. Kinda sounds like they’re not actually interested in following scripture, but creating a cult.

The Bible does in fact guarantee a safe and happy marriage. Ephesians commands husbands to love their wives as Christ did, being willing to lay down their lives for wives.

Also, the trial shows that Jim Bob severely downplayed the details of the molestation.

1 Peter is about suffering/submission in persecution for everyone (not just wives), while promoting the authority of Jesus aka suffering does not accomplish redemption because only Jesus did that (1 Peter 4:12).

The author tells persecuted Christians to submit to human authorities for the sake of furthering the gospel. It says “slaves submitting to your masters” (2:18), “likewise wives submitting to your own husbands” (3:1), and “likewise husbands living with your wives… assigning honor to them” (3:7).

Wives were to submit because this was the simplest way of leading unsaved husbands to Christ. It clearly does not mean wives can change their husbands generally but speaking to a specific situation in which Christian wives were being persecuted for their faith by their unsaved husbands. And the key is the husbands are unbelieving. They aren’t like many “Christian” patriarchs who treat their wives terribly using the very faith meant to give them joy, peace, and freedom.

This is the context Lori is ignoring – a very specific scenario that isn’t even applicable to Anna, nor most situations Christians throw this verse at. Furthermore, the verse isn’t about relationships, it’s about one of the many forms of persecution Christians encountered.

There’s nothing redemptive about suffering. The Bible even says if there’s a way out of persecution, bounce. 1 Corinthians 7:21-23, Were you a bondservant when called? Do not be concerned about it. (But if you can gain your freedom, avail yourself of the opportunity.)… 23You were bought with a price; do not become bondservants of men.” 

Lastly, the Bible tells us exactly what to do with those whom are not acting as God commands. Matthew 7 warns against wolves in sheep’s clothing, telling us to look at the fruit they bear and if they’re not bearing good fruit, cut them down. Not stay married, not defend, cut them.

2 Tim 3 says, “…For people will be lovers of self, lovers of money, boastful, proud,  demeaning, disobedient to parents, ungrateful, unholy, unloving, irreconcilable, slanderers, without self-control, brutal, without love for what is good, traitors, reckless, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, holding to the form of godliness but denying its power. Avoid these people. (CSB). Jesus said to drown those who harm children.

There is not a single verse that says, “except if it’s your husband doing these actions. Then stay married, support him, and ignore everything else the Bible says.” Forgiveness is tantamount to the Gospel, but it’s not a get out of jail free card in terms of consequences, and it must accompany repentance (a confession and genuine desire to change).

We are saved through Christ alone. This no “spiritual” battle, this is Josh facing the consequences of his own actions.

Matthew 19:14-16 (ESV) says, “… You flood the Lord’s altar with tears. You weep and wail because he no longer looks with favor on your offerings or accepts them… 14 You ask, “Why?” It is because the Lord is the witness between you and the wife of your youth. You have been unfaithful to her, though she is your partner, the wife of your marriage covenant...16 The man who hates and divorces his wife,” says the Lord, the God of Israel, does violence to the one he should protect” God hates men whom hate their wives, who they are to protect.

1 Corinthians 7 14-15, “… Yet if the unbeliever leaves, let it be so. The brother or sister is not bound in such circumstances, God has called us to live in peace.”

In Exodus 21, Moses says a wife should leave and marry another man if her husband takes another wife, yet does not provide her with food, clothing, and marital duties aka fulfill his role as a husband. Also, Jesus merely warned against divorce, but didn’t forbid it.

Lastly, Paul says we have a Biblical obligation to expose bad behavior from spouses. Eph. 5: 11-13, “11Have nothing to do with the fruitless deeds of darkness, but rather expose them12 It is shameful even to mention what the disobedient do in secret. 13 But everything exposed by the light becomes visible...”

God does not have an issue with women teaching or holding positions of authority over men (nor must they be silent in church).

  • In Proverbs, wisdom is personified as a she.
  • Deborah was a judge with the highest position in Israel, and was put there by God Almighty Himself.
  • Paul lists several female co-laborers in the Gospel, one of which seems to be an apostle, the other (Phoebe) was a deacon.
  • Timothy learned his faith from his grandmother, a woman.
  • Lydia, a woman, brought the gospel to her entire household, which presumably included men unless she was a lesbian.
  • Ruth and Esther – why would God allow these books in the Bible and then expect men to ignore them?
  • The Shunammite woman didn’t ask her husband’s permission to build a place for Elisha to rest, she simply said let’s build this (2 Kings 4) and did it as she knew it’s what God wanted.
  • Jesus praised Mary for choosing the better option, which was to sit at His feet and learn, while Martha was running around doing housework. This was radical considering women were barred from learning and weren’t even allowed in church.
  • In Genesis 21:12, God literally told Abraham “… whatever Sarah tells you, listen to her and do what she asks, for your descendants will be named through Isaac.”
  • Proverbs 31 woman’s husband had full confidence in her; she is described as having wisdom and faithful instruction.
  • In Corinthians 11, Paul says that every woman who prays and prophesies with her head uncovered in church dishonors her head, meaning women were clearly not silent, nor expected to be, but were praying and prophesying alongside men!

This breed of Paulettes using Paul to say women should stay at home eternally pregnant and never speak take what Paul meant for specific situations and apply it generally. Context matters which is why at times the Bible seems to contradict itself. However, it doesn’t when you are reading scripture to learn who God is, rather than reading scripture simply to defend your point of view or lifestyle. You can find scripture that seems to support abortion (Numbers 5: 27 and Hosea 9:14), which all these fundies would balk at. Yet, this is exactly what they do.

Relegating women to insignificant positions in ministry stifles their God-given potential, and is the equivalent of men going into battle with only one leg. It’s no surprise the American church is crumbling with this stupid attitude propelled by clowns like Voddie, McArthur, and Strachem – rather than partnering with their wives spiritually and in terms of parenting as the Bible says, they subjugate and diminish who God made women to be in an effort to maintain their cults and have access to “Godly” sex.

It’s sad to see Christian women like the Transformed Wife accepting, and even expecting, such low standards from Christian men, who should be above excellent husbands, fathers, and people in general. Anna is well within her right to leave per Paul, Jesus, Moses, or whoever else Lori wants to base her faith on for the day.

Christians should regularly read their Bible and stop listening to those injecting harmful and insidious ideas into the faith intended to support their worldview, rather than teach us who God is.

When we know the Word, we won’t fall prey to the silly doctrines of those like the Transformed Wife, but will be able to combat these harmful ideas with the truth of scripture. We shouldn’t tolerate, nor dismiss, sinful behavior simply because wives are told to submit. This is an intentional twisting of what God created marriage to be like. Submission was never meant to come without husbands displaying the sacrificial love Jesus did for his bride, and we have an obligation to expose sinful behavior when it comes to our attention, whether it be from husbands or someone else.

In Christ, there is neither male nor female. We are Christians first; wives, mothers, sisters, brothers, husbands, men, and women second and God is the ultimate authority over our lives, whether we’re married, or single.

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